Visions of a Life
by Bixata
Summary: Jack's had a bad day, but visions of Joe Spencer and his family cheer him up.


Spoilers: A Matter of Time (Season 2), Citizen Joe (Season 8)

Author's Note: I've been looking for any stories concerning the visions about Joe Spencer that Jack has apparently been having since the end of Season 1. In Citizen Joe he claimed that he found the visions to be relaxing, and I thought that would make for some great stories. So this is what I came up with. Hope you enjoy.

This story takes place after the black hole incident in A Matter of Time.

Bixata

**Visions of a Life**

Jack O'Neill sat in his rarely graced chair behind his barely used desk. His eyes were closed and his head was in his hands, elbows on the desk as he thought about the last few days…or, make that weeks. Christ, he didn't need the headache that thought entailed.

After two days of bed rest he'd finally been released from the infirmary. His muscles ached from the beating he'd suffered as the force of the explosion shoved him against the Gate Room wall before he crashed to the floor as the gravity generated through the wormhole of the Stargate disappeared. Teal'c had managed to pull him far enough away from the actual explosion so he hadn't suffered any burns, but his neck and arms were covered with antibiotic and small bandages, evidence of the glass shower he'd taken when the Control Room window shattered.

They'd saved the planet, again, but it was little consolation since they'd been the ones to put the planet at risk in the first place. He'd done the grunt work to remedy their mistake. The solution had been Carter's brilliant idea but he'd been the one to sacrifice his body, and sanity, for a plan he didn't understand and didn't care to ever understand. It had been their only option.

They had lost some good men, and good friends, on Major Henry Boyd's team. And, despite what Jack personally thought of the man he never would have wished that kind of death, or any, really, on Frank Cromwell. Sure, the man had left him behind to die when he was hit on a mission in Iraq, and he had spent the next four months in that Iraqi hellhole of a prison, but Frank didn't deserve to die because of it.

Jack wasn't entirely sure if he had truly forgiven the man. Let's face it, Jack O'Neill wasn't exactly big on the whole forgiveness thing. He could hold a grudge like none other, even with himself. And not speaking ill of the dead meant nothing to him if he spoke ill of them when they were alive.

The only difference was he wouldn't dwell. Focus on the living, for they are the only ones you can help.

Perhaps he was growing wise in his old age for he realized that is what Frank Cromwell had been doing when he left Jack behind all those years ago. Cromwell had thought Jack wouldn't survive, the blood seeping into his shirt would have supported that misconception. Cromwell had made a mistake and Jack, and Sara as well, had paid dearly for it. It was a logical mistake, and Jack was grateful the rest of his team had survived but Jack had still suffered because of it.

He sighed as he leaned back in the chair, arms behind his head now, squeezing the tension out of his skull and hoping the headache would recede. Once he finished his report he could go home, drink an ice cold beer, kick back on the couch, watch whatever garbage happened to be on TV and forget about the world around him, forget that he had just missed two weeks of normal life in what he had perceived to be only a few hours. Nothing unusual about that, just life passing him by.

Life by himself, alone. There was nobody waiting at home for him, no Sara and no…he couldn't go there. That was risky territory, even after three years. There was no use thinking about it because he could never get that back, it was something he could never have again-

As it always had before the image came suddenly out of nowhere.

"Shh, be quiet, Dad, or you'll ruin the surprise." The young boy whispered into his father's ear as they squatted behind a couch, peeking over the top at the front door.

"Now, son, that's no way to speak to your elders." The man said with a twist of a smile, his words scolding but his tone tinged with good humor.

Jack smiled as the boy, Andy, shifted nervously. "I'm sorry, Dad. Please be quiet so Mom won't hear us when she comes in."

The man, Joe, grinned at his son. "That's better. And I'll be quiet now."

Just seconds later the front door opened and a woman stepped through carrying several plastic grocery bags, her long dark hair framing her face and threatening to cover her eyes. Ah, Charlene, Jack sighed happily as he settled back into his chair to enjoy the moment of family life playing out before him.

"Honey, I'm home. Could you come help me with the groceries?" She didn't bother waiting as she kicked the door closed behind her. "Joe?" She called out again as she moved to the kitchen.

Andy and his father leapt out from behind the couch, holding their arms out wide and shouting, "Surprise!"

Charlene jumped back in alarm, dropping her bags, her hand coming up to her chest as she gasped loudly.

"Joe, Honey, you about gave me a heart attack. What's the meaning of all this?" Her voice was soft and gentle as it always was, and Jack marveled at how she always seemed to be so calm, loving, and understanding.

The boy rushed forward and wrapped his arms around her, looking up at her with an innocent and adorable smile. "Happy birthday, Mom. I made you a cake, I decorated it and everything." He grabbed her hand and started pulling her towards the kitchen while Joe picked up the grocery bags and followed them.

Charlene looked stunned as she followed her son, glancing back at her husband briefly. "You baked a cake for me? That was so sweet of you, Andy."

"He made it all by himself, didn't you, son?" Joe boasted proudly, standing behind his son and resting his hands on the boy's shoulders.

Andy grinned up at his dad. "Uh-huh. All by myself. Do you like it?"

The cake was a mess, globs of frosting on a misshapen mound, candles poking out all over and cake crumbs sprinkled on top from where the candles had been pulled out and moved. Jack loved it as much as Charlene seemed to, which was a lot.

"Oh, this is such a wonderful surprise, Andy. Thank you, Sweetie." She bent down and kissed her son on the forehead.

An image of an entirely different kind came to Jack's mind as he watched the happy family celebrate Charlene's birthday. It was a memory of Sara and Charlie after he had come home early from a mission to surprise them. Charlie's face had lit up with happiness at seeing his father and Sara…well, she was positively radiant as they were engulfed in a big bear hug.

As the image of Joe Spencer and his happy family faded, Jack leaned back in his chair, more relaxed than he had been even before the black hole incident. He gave a playful salute to his three favorite people outside of work.

"Here's to you, Joe Spencer. You are one lucky bastard."

He quickly typed up his report and handed it in to the General with a flourish. On his way out he went in search of his teammates, inviting them over to his house for the evening. He may not have Sara and Charlie anymore, but today, he had a reason to celebrate, he still had people to fight for, and he didn't have to be alone. He had a new family now, and he would do anything to keep them safe.


End file.
